Well, it’s one way to detract from baffling sexual ambiguity I suppose.

This is what you get when you retire from Dominos. Which you will immediately have to turn around and pawn because you spent your life working at Dominos.

Well, if this doesn’t just put the Hard in Hardy Boys

And then a look of pure otterage crossed his face.

You at least have to give her points for customer service(d).

Dadgum sonsabitches didn’t even let me chicken fry it first neither.

Watching a Greatest American Hero marathon in your mom’s basement is the leading cause of this.

If you’re trying to beat the heat but don’t have a pool, you can always play Marco Polo with your udder-nipples instead.

Draggy wasn’t the same after the bris.

Oh, Betsy Hosegood, alright (except on knitting night).

You’d hide too if you were expected to shit in a box filled with sand for the rest of your life.

Stretch Marksman

Reverse Cowgirl: You’re doing it wrong.

Sometimes, an Affliction takes you to the great big Tapout in the sky.

Whatever, flattie.